ICYMI: Your husband is meant to be shared with other women, cleric tells Muslim wives
Women protecting their husbands from polygamy are “thieves” who want everything for themselves, renowned Islamic scholar and founder of Baynakum Family Counseling Centre, Ustaz Abdulfattah Adeyemi, has said.
He advised Muslim women to share their husbands with other women, saying they have just 25 per cent access to their husbands, while the remaining 75 per cent belongs to other women.
The cleric said this in a paper entitled: “Charity, a path to Jannah,” which he presented in Abuja during the inauguration of Sisters of Jannah, a Muslim women’s charity organisation.
Charging women to be magnanimous in sharing their husbands, Ustaz admonished them “not to deny their husbands polygamy,” but should only pray that the husbands treat all equally in any action taken.
He regretted that some married women were “so over-protective” of their husbands, thereby denying the men their wishes of having more wives, describing such as “ungodly.”
Ustaz also said the over-protective tendencies of some women towards their husbands had made many men to devise “smart means” of engaging in illegal relationships outside their matrimonial homes, advising that the trend must stop.
He urged housewives to “stop being unnecessarily jealous of their husbands’ relationships outside.”
According to him, the faithfulness of men can only be known after their death, saying some men father children outside their marriages, only for their secrets to be uncovered after their death.
He blamed wives for the men’s actions.
Ustaz said, “Let me tell you that your husband is only yours 25 per cent; your husband is not your property; your only share of him is 25 per cent. The remaining 75 per cent belongs to other women.
“If you want your husband 100 per cent, then you are a thief; you are going beyond the 25 per cent that is yours; the remaining 75 per cent belongs to other ladies.
“Don’t think that because you are wives, other women should not share your husbands.
“Men are not stupid, the men are even becoming smart. It’s until when some die that you know how many children they have.
“I am not saying that is what happens every time; but if you think you are too smart, men are smarter.
“You have never been a man before in your life, you can’t imagine what goes through in the minds of men. Let us fear Allah, as much as possible.
“If Allah makes it easy for you, if they ask you to shift, please shift a little so that somebody else can also sit down.
“And you that is asking somebody else to shift, you have to fear Allah; you that they want to allow to come in, fear Allah. Don’t go there and scatter their lives for them. Don’t go there and constitute problem for them.
“The man may be doing it for the sake of Allah, don’t let him regret it.”
Ustaz said women were the reasons most polygamous homes fail, saying they should have a change of heart.
“Whenever you see polygamy that is not successful, it is because of a woman.
“Na woman dey do woman. The one that is inside the house and the one that is coming into the house and both women.
“It is women that are the enemies of women. If the man is trying to be just, it is the other woman that will go and enter him and turn his head the other way. You will be going North and he will be going South.
“It is two women that are both diabolical because of a man. We men are the Angels that Allah sends to help women.”
Speaking on the topic: “Islam and Feminism”, founder and chancellor of Islamic Online University, Dr. Bilal Philips, challenged Muslim women to seek knowledge so as to better their understanding of things.
He said he was speaking on the topic to clarify the distinction between western feminism and feminism within the context of Islam.
“These distinctions need to be made in order for Muslim women to understand where they should focus and stay within the modern path, so as not to go to the extreme and break the laws of Sharia.
“I advise Muslim women to seek knowledge, gain knowledge and apply the knowledge in their lives — knowledge that will benefit them in both this life and the next.”